I am a POWERFUL woman who will undoubtedly meet, date & marry a POWERFUL man. As a powerful human being – I am here on a mission that is bigger than me and therefore bigger than the partner I end up with. Instead of being cuddled up in insecurity all night, I have to be confident in my purpose here to inspire others, which may include lonely nights, sleepless nights, and some days just the thought of our existence will have to
In understanding that, I came to the realization of how UNREALISTIC it is to operate based on my feelings and how BENEFICIAL it is to operate based on my purpose and intention in the world.
Sidenote: Imagine if Michelle & Barack operated based on their feelings from being alone at night, or being in the limelight and being scrutinized, or having to put their young daughters up to be lambasted by the very narrow minds in the world; their probable, almost certain future would have been full of scandals, failures, and expectancies of the First Black Family in the White House. But they didn’t. I am obviously not apart of their household, however when I aspire to create one of my own, they are an inspiration.
I have operated based on my Cancerian feelings in the past and they led me to overeat, take jobs with minimal exposure (back office), date men that had zero freaking clue, be petty as hell, be emotionally lonely because I never wanted to feel the discomfort of pain and I would say things that were true & hurtful to and about others, using authenticity to justify myself.
In actuality I was defending my own insecurity.
I was “happy” in situations that were undeserving of me; jobs, relationships, contracts & conversations because of my inability to be responsible for and manage my feelings. This was not a way of life that I enjoyed. I was blaming others for the way I felt and I was getting the results and levels of achievement that others believed I was worthy of.
I was content, also known as average.
Average: less than extraordinary.
There was a better option.
I now prefer to operate taking total responsibility for my feelings. Every day I choose to operate based on my purpose & intention in the world while acknowledging my humanly egotistical feelings and understand that they are not real until validated.
Our feelings are usually linked to an experience in the past that does not apply in reality. What is happening now, in all actuality has absolutely nothing to do with what happened 10 years ago, even when it seems similar or completely the same. When my feelings come steamrolling up, I make it a point to stop and evaluate their validity using a quick 60-second exercise that I call the Confidence Check-In.
The Confidence Check-In is a method I have implemented as a goto to eliminate the things my “average self” does, in order to incorporate the things my most powerful self would do. The entire time, I am being confident in myself and not insecure because of my feelings. It allows me to consistently make choices that benefit the greatest good for my life.
The Confidence Check-In is a series of questions that when answered allow you to deal with what is happening in reality and with this info, you can then Choose powerfully.
Step 1: Review What Actually Happened?
Review the actual ACTIONS that took place in sequence.
- This happened
- and then this
- and then this
- and then this, etc.
Step 2: Questions Your Feelings
Ask yourself these questions and answer them out loud to get present to how your human body is feeling.
- Does this feel good to me?
- Are my feelings based on what happened or past experience?
- How do I want to feel right now?
- Does how I want to feel support my peace of mind?
- Is it in alignment with what I see for me and my best life?
- Will this choice assist in the design & creation of the life I dream of living?
- Is this someone or something I’m proud to be associated with?
- Will this benefit me and therefore the world?
- Is my higher power leading me here?
- Is this choice based on integrity?
Step 3: Choose
Choices are based on NOW. Decisions are based on the past.
Choose the response or reaction that will create the best life for you. There is vision that we each have for our lives and we also believe that when accomplish the vision that we will start doing the things our best self would do and then will be the person we always dreamt of.
Life is actually the reverse of that. We can choose to be the person we dream of now, then do the things our best self would do and then we will have the life we dream of.
Where can this be applied? – This check-in is applicable if you’re out with friends, in the boardroom with colleagues and when you’re dealing with family matters. Using this quick tool will allow you to be powerful, do powerful things and have the powerful life you desire.
By using the Confidence Check-In, I have become a powerful human being and you can too. This Check-In can be the powerful tool that takes you from having a probable, almost certain future as detailed by others, or you can create life as it happens – as you have always dreamed.
As a result of repeated use, I have gained the following results:
I am confidently me; all of me.
I choose, powerfully.
I do, freely.
I live, abundantly.
I live in reality.
I enjoy what the universe has for me right now. I am gratitude.
I am love, unconditionally.
I am catalyst for you to live confidently, authentically and successfully in your purpose.
Are you interested in living out your true potential and inspiring others by being purposeful and confident in who you are? I want to work with you.
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