Confidence; a feeling or belief that you can do something well or succeed at something. : a feeling or belief that someone or something is good or has the ability to succeed at something. : the feeling of being certain that something will happen or that something is true.
I have learned a-lot about vulnerability throughout this year, and it has continued to show up at various points, right when it’s time for me to make a shift in my life. Most recently, it came up when I evaluated what being confident means to me. I understood where my confidence had supported me in winning, as a leader it comes in handy daily, and I also noted where my confidence could’ve been switched for a confident humility.
my confidence has to be in integrity – meaning that I have to accept 100% of myself….
As a self-proclaimed and life lived “confident person”, being confident was always looking like I had it together, it was dealing with my sh*t in silence and showing the world the face of someone that is never swayed, it was being on my Ps & Qs so I could save the day when others inevitably f*cked up and most importantly, it was never allowing anyone else to feel like I really needed them, especially not emotionally. It was how I showed my strength and hid my soft spots. Luckily for me and the world, a shift is required of me.
In understanding my trajectory as a human being and what it means to be a human being – I know that my confidence has to be in integrity – meaning that I have to accept 100% of myself, including my big secret, and walk powerfully and profoundly in who I am. Confidence is only real when you have no secrets. It is understanding that your past is just that, the past. It was an experience that happened at a point in your life journey and does not define your life.
Being confident is all of the things in its definition – however, my bonus add-on is that what makes confidence REAL, is acknowledging, loving and wearing proudly the bits of you that no-one else sees. It is knowing that your “ugly” is as beautiful as you make it, your ‘not knowing’ only makes you a novice – (how sexy is that word?), creating the opportunity to learn everything and you are only the things YOU tell yourself.
perfect, whole & complete.
5 Vibes To the Confident You
Acceptance – Instead of trying to bury unpleasant life experiences, acknowledge and accept them for what they are. Your life experiences do not define you; choose to leave them in the past and go forward with a blank slate.
Affirmations – You are who you say you are! Think about how often you speak things in your life into existence; things as small as the timing of the train here in NYC. In order to create new beliefs about who you are, the best & most powerful tool is your word. Begin by writing positive and uplifting notes to yourself and read them consistently – with time, they become your truth.
Accreditation – Commit to who you are and what you want. Set SMART goals for your personal growth and achieve them. Celebrate with a reward. Ex: A fast of some sort – social media, food or a person.
Agreeance – Share your growth with others. Enroll them into who you are being, not who you have been. When you are who you say you are, who you are BEING speaks for itself.
Accolades – BE who you say you are, DO the things that you would be doing at your highest & best self and then you will HAVE the things you dream of.